moonlog

The Second City's 'Killer'

• Woman: I need someone taken care of immediately.
• Man: Who is it?
• Woman: Barack Obama.
• Man: What's your name?
• Woman: I don't see why that matters.
• Man: What's your name?
• Woman: Right. It's . . . Sillary Tinton. . . . all right, so you'll do it?
• Man: No, I won't.
• Woman: What?
• Man: I can't kill Barack Obama.
• Woman: Why?
• Man: I'm in love with him.
• Woman: Ugh.
• Man: I think he's dreamy.
• Woman: You are the eleventh assassin I've talked to and they've all said the same thing. What is it with this guy?
• Man: He's just the right amount of black.